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CRACK THEATRE - Tasteful Porn
Hi, I don't know what possessed me, please don't hurt me. This is raunchy and so not worksafe. NC-17 for doll nudity and Ed's extreme potty mouth.
Plushie!Ed: Dammit, why do I have to watch the kids? This fuckin' sucks, just because I'm the youngest...and made one of them.
P!E: Damn, Roy Jr. is precousious isn't he? Doesn't look like E.J. is objecting to the extreme liplock though.
P!E: Man, the hair on the back of my neck is standing up...like someones watching me... WTF? SKY!SKY! GET IN HERE, THERE'S A PERVERT IN A BOX!
Davy: Hi there cutie, OMG, are those your kids?! They're so CUTE!
Sky: What? What's wrong? DAMMIT, I'm not babysitting for you again, it's your turn!
P!E: What? NO! LOOK! Over there, what the fuck is that?!
Sky: Eh? Oh, that's Haku's Very Expensive Doll. His name is Davy. Be nice.
P!E: The fuck I will! He's naked isn't he? And he's staring at the kids and my crotch maybe! WTF? Who said you could get another doll?! What is this, a damn hotel?
Sky: Haku is allowed to buy dolls...you know he cost like a zillion times more than you, techincally I should like him better!
P!E: Fickle Bitch!
Davy: Someone has issues. Honey, you know if you are made like I am, you want people to admire.
P!E: The FUCK! I got kids here you extreme pedo! GEEZE, get some pants!
Davy: Just because they are young doesn't mean they can't appreciate such fine articulation.
P!E: Dammit! SKY! ROY!
Davy: The fact I can stand up by myself should be very impressive to those truly interested in quality doll-age. I have a bubble butt, Haku squealed when she saw it.
P!E: OMFG, c'mere kids! Aren't the cops suppose to inform the community when extreme pedo pervo fuck-heads move in?!
Davy: You know, you're really cute when you're purple with rage, the color is very becoming.
Plushie!Colonel: YES! My prayers are answered, where have you been all my life you anatomically correct babe?
Davy: Teehee! Hi there yourself.
P!E: THE FUCK! Get outta my lap you tiny military hor! Quit squirming around!
Davy: You're much nicer than your friend there, what's your name little boy?
P!C: Roy...Roy Mustang, and don't let the size fool you. I've had to remind short and bitter here that it's quality, not quanity.
Davy: I like quality...
Davy: OMG, is that your dad with the hot eyepatch?
Eyepatch: Hello there, no I'm not his father, I'm too young for children. What's your sign, number, measurements? Are you free tonight?
P!E: FUCKERS! Roy! Roy! You're both dead meat, GET OUT OF MY LAP!
Munich!Ed: Herr Oberst...I'm wounded. All this time you've been plying me with sweet words, and here let one little distraction come along, and then what? What am I?
Eyepatch: Fuckin' hot is what you are, god the two of you standing there together...extreme wood.
P!C: DO HIM! I'LL GIVE YOU A DOLLAR!
P!E: WTF?! HORS! PERVOS! PEDOS!
M!E: The one thing my time in Germany taught me...and that was how to seme. Too bad I didn't have an Alfons!Plushie to practice on properly, but I read a lot of text books.
Davy: OH MY! Teehee...ohohoh....
Sky: 0_0 OMFG, Haku will KILL ME! Get off that doll, he's not that much of a slut...I don't think.
P!C: HARDER FASTER AND THERE'S A SHINY QUARTER IN IT FOR YOU!
P!E: FUCKER! Move, I can't see, come on, one you move over...
P!C: Here's the dollar, see?! Come on, you can make him scream louder than that!
Eyepatch: Davy was right, he IS high quality articulation
P!E, P!C and Eyepatch: .....whoa
Scarpollini: Landshark
Eyepatch: No, no not now, that's for a later skit
Scarpollini: oh, sorry dude, so I'll like...come back later
Eyepatch: Huh?Yeah, whatever
Plushie!ArmorAl: Hey guys, whatcha doin'?
P!C: AL! MOVE IT I'm paying for this show and I ain't gonna miss it
Eyepatch: Al, you're aren't opaque just because you're a disembodied spirit sealed in a nylon casing stuffed with fibers, scoot over
P!E: OMFG AL! DON'T WATCH THIS FILTH!
P!AA: Other Big Brother! What are you doing?
M!E: Was? Oh...nut-ting... Um... Alphonse lieber...vy don't you go and play somevhere else? There is nut-ting to see here
P!C: WTF?! Oh come on, dollar see? DOLLAR!
Eyepatch: Al, I think I hear kittens about two miles up the road, why don't you go look
P!E: I...I'm having unnatural thoughts...WTF
P!E: HEY, other stupid retarded speaking ME! TWENTY BUCKS, TWENTY BUCKS TO DO AL!
P!C: ....OK I'M IN, TWENTY ONE BUCKS!
Eyepatch: Will you do lap dances afterwards?!
Sky: You guys are going to get me killed and WTF, don't encourage the armor to have sex, he's too young! ED, I'm ashamed!
P!E: Oh please, Elricest is the only true canon and we all know it.
Davy: You're all so silly, I think I'm gonna like it here, c'mere sweetie, let me love on you some.
P!AA: Hello! Are you Other Big Brother's friend?
Davy: Why sure sweetheart, I can be your friend too
P!C: I want to be your friend in a touchy, feely way!
Eyepatch: I want to be your friend in a your butt in the air way!
P!E: TWENTY FUCKIN' BUCKS WHY IS THERE NO ED ON AL ACTION?!
Plastic!Colonel: OK, that's enough, I'm here as a representative of the GEN side of the household and I've had my fill of this depravity.
P!C: Nice hat
Plastic!C: Shut up
Eyepatch: Goes well with your eyes
Plastic!C:Shut up
Sky: I had nothing to do with this! NOTHING! My head is still sore from the last time you all leapt on me, I'm innocent!
Davy: OMG, another non-plush being, not articulated but I'm not prejudice, OMG what a cute dog! Hi!
Plastic!C: I have twenty bucks here, I'm willing to overlook this sort of thing this time if you get on top.
M!E: We'll have to switch out Eds, I don't uke.
P!E: THE FUCK! Ok, 50/50
Sky: Dead, so fucking dead when Haku catches me, so fuckin' dead.
Davy: I can do a split for 40 bucks.
Colonels: DEAL!
P!E: I got Sky's wallet...
the end, pls send prozac.
Plushie!Ed: Dammit, why do I have to watch the kids? This fuckin' sucks, just because I'm the youngest...and made one of them.
P!E: Damn, Roy Jr. is precousious isn't he? Doesn't look like E.J. is objecting to the extreme liplock though.
P!E: Man, the hair on the back of my neck is standing up...like someones watching me... WTF? SKY!SKY! GET IN HERE, THERE'S A PERVERT IN A BOX!
Davy: Hi there cutie, OMG, are those your kids?! They're so CUTE!
Sky: What? What's wrong? DAMMIT, I'm not babysitting for you again, it's your turn!
P!E: What? NO! LOOK! Over there, what the fuck is that?!
Sky: Eh? Oh, that's Haku's Very Expensive Doll. His name is Davy. Be nice.
P!E: The fuck I will! He's naked isn't he? And he's staring at the kids and my crotch maybe! WTF? Who said you could get another doll?! What is this, a damn hotel?
Sky: Haku is allowed to buy dolls...you know he cost like a zillion times more than you, techincally I should like him better!
P!E: Fickle Bitch!
Davy: Someone has issues. Honey, you know if you are made like I am, you want people to admire.
P!E: The FUCK! I got kids here you extreme pedo! GEEZE, get some pants!
Davy: Just because they are young doesn't mean they can't appreciate such fine articulation.
P!E: Dammit! SKY! ROY!
Davy: The fact I can stand up by myself should be very impressive to those truly interested in quality doll-age. I have a bubble butt, Haku squealed when she saw it.
P!E: OMFG, c'mere kids! Aren't the cops suppose to inform the community when extreme pedo pervo fuck-heads move in?!
Davy: You know, you're really cute when you're purple with rage, the color is very becoming.
Plushie!Colonel: YES! My prayers are answered, where have you been all my life you anatomically correct babe?
Davy: Teehee! Hi there yourself.
P!E: THE FUCK! Get outta my lap you tiny military hor! Quit squirming around!
Davy: You're much nicer than your friend there, what's your name little boy?
P!C: Roy...Roy Mustang, and don't let the size fool you. I've had to remind short and bitter here that it's quality, not quanity.
Davy: I like quality...
Davy: OMG, is that your dad with the hot eyepatch?
Eyepatch: Hello there, no I'm not his father, I'm too young for children. What's your sign, number, measurements? Are you free tonight?
P!E: FUCKERS! Roy! Roy! You're both dead meat, GET OUT OF MY LAP!
Munich!Ed: Herr Oberst...I'm wounded. All this time you've been plying me with sweet words, and here let one little distraction come along, and then what? What am I?
Eyepatch: Fuckin' hot is what you are, god the two of you standing there together...extreme wood.
P!C: DO HIM! I'LL GIVE YOU A DOLLAR!
P!E: WTF?! HORS! PERVOS! PEDOS!
M!E: The one thing my time in Germany taught me...and that was how to seme. Too bad I didn't have an Alfons!Plushie to practice on properly, but I read a lot of text books.
Davy: OH MY! Teehee...ohohoh....
Sky: 0_0 OMFG, Haku will KILL ME! Get off that doll, he's not that much of a slut...I don't think.
P!C: HARDER FASTER AND THERE'S A SHINY QUARTER IN IT FOR YOU!
P!E: FUCKER! Move, I can't see, come on, one you move over...
P!C: Here's the dollar, see?! Come on, you can make him scream louder than that!
Eyepatch: Davy was right, he IS high quality articulation
P!E, P!C and Eyepatch: .....whoa
Scarpollini: Landshark
Eyepatch: No, no not now, that's for a later skit
Scarpollini: oh, sorry dude, so I'll like...come back later
Eyepatch: Huh?Yeah, whatever
Plushie!ArmorAl: Hey guys, whatcha doin'?
P!C: AL! MOVE IT I'm paying for this show and I ain't gonna miss it
Eyepatch: Al, you're aren't opaque just because you're a disembodied spirit sealed in a nylon casing stuffed with fibers, scoot over
P!E: OMFG AL! DON'T WATCH THIS FILTH!
P!AA: Other Big Brother! What are you doing?
M!E: Was? Oh...nut-ting... Um... Alphonse lieber...vy don't you go and play somevhere else? There is nut-ting to see here
P!C: WTF?! Oh come on, dollar see? DOLLAR!
Eyepatch: Al, I think I hear kittens about two miles up the road, why don't you go look
P!E: I...I'm having unnatural thoughts...WTF
P!E: HEY, other stupid retarded speaking ME! TWENTY BUCKS, TWENTY BUCKS TO DO AL!
P!C: ....OK I'M IN, TWENTY ONE BUCKS!
Eyepatch: Will you do lap dances afterwards?!
Sky: You guys are going to get me killed and WTF, don't encourage the armor to have sex, he's too young! ED, I'm ashamed!
P!E: Oh please, Elricest is the only true canon and we all know it.
Davy: You're all so silly, I think I'm gonna like it here, c'mere sweetie, let me love on you some.
P!AA: Hello! Are you Other Big Brother's friend?
Davy: Why sure sweetheart, I can be your friend too
P!C: I want to be your friend in a touchy, feely way!
Eyepatch: I want to be your friend in a your butt in the air way!
P!E: TWENTY FUCKIN' BUCKS WHY IS THERE NO ED ON AL ACTION?!
Plastic!Colonel: OK, that's enough, I'm here as a representative of the GEN side of the household and I've had my fill of this depravity.
P!C: Nice hat
Plastic!C: Shut up
Eyepatch: Goes well with your eyes
Plastic!C:Shut up
Sky: I had nothing to do with this! NOTHING! My head is still sore from the last time you all leapt on me, I'm innocent!
Davy: OMG, another non-plush being, not articulated but I'm not prejudice, OMG what a cute dog! Hi!
Plastic!C: I have twenty bucks here, I'm willing to overlook this sort of thing this time if you get on top.
M!E: We'll have to switch out Eds, I don't uke.
P!E: THE FUCK! Ok, 50/50
Sky: Dead, so fucking dead when Haku catches me, so fuckin' dead.
Davy: I can do a split for 40 bucks.
Colonels: DEAL!
P!E: I got Sky's wallet...
the end, pls send prozac.